Getting to know me...

I'm learning more and more about myself and what makes me tick lately. Though I don't know whether to be scared by what I'm learning or to embrace it and run with it.

I ran into a neighbor this morning and had an impromptu playdate at her house. Her house is laid out almost exactly like ours, and yet her house feels so open and calm. She seems so calm. While they don't have a neat and tidy house - I mean, come on, they have a 2 year old, too - they don't have large size or amounts of furniture taking up a lot of space. I think I want to send DH to the dump with a couch or two tonight.

We scheduled another playdate for later in the week, and I'd like to open my home to her and her son, but I'm afraid it will make me look like a nutjob. I feel so frenetic. I feel like my house conveys this.

I get stressed at some stuff that maybe other people have more patience for, like DD taking 20 minutes to focus enough to put on her shoes so we can get out the door to just run to the library to drop off books. If I want to do something quickly, I don't like things holding me back. But I also get distracted easily. Hey, a plane! What?

I get crazy when the baby's crying and my daughter's whining and the TV is on. The TV is always the first to go. I hate the TV on when there's other stuff to deal with. Unless of course it's a distraction for the girl, enough so I can do dishes.

At the moment, I have a very small load of pooped-on clothes in the wash, and as I was peeling the Cinderella panties off my daughter's toosh, I realized that poopy pants don't bother me. Other than being stinky, I don't stress about having to deal with the poop stains. Stains don't bother me. I'm proud of this. One thing to embrace.